Distractions

One of the things that a cancer patient doesn't want is to be looked at differently. We still think of the same stuff we would think of before diagnosis.

I strongly dislike it when I'm at a mall and some people would look at me with dread, being in a wheelchair and wearing a bandana, like they are seeing a ghost. Or when I'm always approached in a serious manner like I don't think of anything else but cancer and death. 

Cancer patients are still ALIVE! 

As there is still so much life in me, there are a lot of things that I still want to do - and I mean regular things, not only stuff a dying person would do. 

Sure, I already prepared a journal, letters, and a scrapbook for my children and husband. This sickness may have made life even more dramatic, but I have moments of sheer shallowness.

I think one ingredient to survival is not taking yourself too seriously. I told my children in the beginning that I'd do everything to get well and if that means being light-hearted at times, that I'd be. 

I still think of make-up, shoes, and clothes, dates with my husband and fun breaks with my children.

I do selfies,

flashbacks,

food shots,

or any shot I could think of.

I go to Pinterest for cute outfits,

good food,

home designs,

party ideas, 

and a lot of other pretty things.

I love watching tv shows, and these are the ones I particularly enjoy:

I call these things, distractions. I need them, maybe, as much as I need all my meds. They're like pain drugs that help me forget....Yes, sometimes, I really just want to forget. 

Summer Recap

It is the first week of June and summer is almost over. In just a few days, I'll be starting with home school with my three girls ages, 10, 14, and 17. 

I know! I have a lot to plan for their education. We'll make it fun and flexible. But before all that, let me give you a recap of what went on in the Tanabe household.

Summer is when I began with my third chemo regimen. After another major surgery, we were hoping that this third drug, Xeloda, would work very well for me. The good news is, it does. My oncologist is very happy to give me her report that the cancer site is decreasing in size. 

With the convenience that this oral chemo brings, I was able to do a lot with the family. Yay!

First stop was Baguio, the summer capital of the Philippines. We had a great time eating delicious food, doing a little shopping and simply, bonding as a family. 

Also, I started my blog! Inspired by some quotes I have found through these years and by this book I received from two of my friends based in Australia.

There is a lot to be said. I believe, it is the healthiest to be able to express them all. Hopefully, the blog brings some inspiration to my readers. 

Next, we celebrated my daughter's 17th birthday. It was good to be out with the family as I've been spending most of my time at home.

This summer, my youngest, Joey, started her youtube channel, and her dad supports her by being her cameraman and editor. She was inspired by the so many young girls just doing their thing on cam, namely the Seven Super Girls or SSG.

I have also enjoyed the numerous dishes my husband cooked for me.

Spent a lot of relaxing moments with my bff, Hilda :) Thankful for the hospitality of the whole family. 

My 17-year old participated to be a part of the worship team for a convergence of the different churches in Bulacan. Happy for her.

My 14-year old, Toni, won gold for her most recent archery tournament. Wow! 

Celebrated Mother's Day, and heard my eldest speak and sing to the church that day. Wonderful time.

Had a relaxing and fun time with the whole family and my husband's friends in this resort, not so far away from our place. 

We watched my youngest daughter's ballet recital. She looked so pretty and danced so gracefully.

We recently just spontaneously drove to Subic for some family time before my 5th cycle of Xeloda and we had so much fun.

We spent our summer in very simple ways, but what mattered most was we had a lot of time to bond as a family, get to know each other a little more, learn to take care of each other better, and more importantly, as a mom, observe even more closely my children's hearts. I am joyous to see that the difficulties we've been facing have created in them strength of character. To me, that is the greatest of all I have experienced these two months of intense heat. 

Now, I'm excited for our Father's Day celebration ;)

Cancer Perks

 

Please don't judge me after this post. There is this thing that we call, "cancer perks" at home. 
It's something my children came up with and we all laugh about it. 

Cancer perks mean, I am not expected to do house work, can sleep the whole day, and when I ask for something, like food, or something I want for us to do as a family, as long as it's within reason, my husband buys or does it for me. To be honest, I enjoy this a lot. Haha

One patient talked about the time he was just diagnosed with lung cancer. He started to enjoy life. He drove his Benz up a mountain, enjoyed the view and wind, and drank his red wine. "Ang sarap mag-ka-cancer," he continued to say. 

Cancer patients are encouraged to take fun seriously. We are urged to truly live, and live to the fullest; to do what we've always wanted to do. We are not looked at in a weird way when we cry, get scared, or have emotional breakdowns.

Cancer perks. :)

At home, we only have one helper. We call someone from time to time to clean and work in the garden. We bring our clothes to a laundry shop. So it's pretty manageable. I've chosen this system at home, so we are all more encouraged to move and do chores, especially my children. 

When I was well and strong. I did some of the housework; cooked, washed the dishes, gave the dog a bath, and picked leaves in the garden, and a few more things to help out our helper and Doods. 

This time, though I still do a few things at home, I really am not expected to do anything, except to work on getting well, strong, stable, and happy.

Cancer perks! 

I take this as an opportunity to train my girls as well, to be more responsible at home. The things I used to do are now passed on to them. There are certain chores assigned to them. And they are not only taught to do these things, but to do them willingly, even cheerfully. 

It isn't always easy to motivate them to work around the house. But more and more they are learning. When they see me just sitting while they do work, they all jokingly say, "cancer perks." Inside, I giggle.