There is something baffling about a co-fighter's passing.
Yesterday, when a friend whose cancer type was the same as mine, died, I felt lost. While I was sad for her and those she left behind, I was scared for myself. For over a year, we would compare notes as we had the same breast cancer type, first oncologist, chemo meds....she was like a companion whose presence gave me an assurance that I was going to be ok.
For a time, it seemed like having breast cancer at stage 4 and thriving is starting to become a norm with all the improvements in the areas of medicine and technology, and with all the support groups that are readily available for those suffering the disease.
When I heard about her, I cried. I thought of all our conversations: how we were both so positive, those numerous times she would remind me she was always praying for me, how happy she was with her doctor, but anxious at the same time for all the tests, scans and injections. I thought of her girls whom she loved dearly: how she would still be present for their school events, her motherly and proud smile as she raved about their antics and talents. I could tell, despite cancer, she was full of life.
I thought deeply once again about this illness: how nothing in this predicament is certain. You can be full of life and positivity one day, and be down the next. You only do your best. You rely on the Giver of life. You pray, and trust. You only choose to continue in hope.
As my friend moved on to her new and pain-free path, I continue with mine. Even though I will still meet many challenges, and experience some pain, I know that the path God has for me is unique just like everyone else's, with or without cancer. I am eager, nervous, and thrilled to see God's plan unfold before my very eyes. No fear, only trust.
(Please pray for the family of Patty Buencamino Balquiedra, her two daughters, Anissa and Sabine, and husband, Neal Narvaez.)
