Normal

I still remember those days when I would do my usual activities for work, or with my family, WITHOUT any thought of what I was feeling in my body, what was there and what wasn't. I was strong, young, and had a lot of plans and dreams for myself and my family. 

Things were just....normal. 

These days, I am constantly reminded of this disease I am carrying, with the constant discomfort, limitations on activities and food, numerous pills I take everyday, regular visits to the hospital, injections, scans, hearing some heavy stuff from my doctor, and seeing the scars I gained these past months. Things have changed dramatically for me. Sometimes, I still cry.

But my life isn't necessarily worse.

When I hear my children laugh, play, and see them grow in their interests and talents, it means so much more.

My husband, whose life changed dramatically as well, still have fun, is more focused, has become a better listener, comforter and friend, and....has been busier in the kitchen, which he said he enjoys. 

My heart is happy to see my family grow and become more mature through it all. I am truly blessed.

As for me, I have been learning to be more appreciative of so many things I used to take for granted.

I stand in the shower thanking God that I still have the strength to refresh myself. 

I breathe deeply and I am grateful that my lungs are clear and my heart is strong and healthy. 

Here are a few more things I am grateful for as well:

fun moments with my family

talk time with my husband

better and healthier food at home, and enjoying them  

chats with my friends 

reading books

w a t c h i n g   m o v i e s 

enjoying art

having a clear mind to still think, plan and pray for the future 

MUSIC 

 that I am able to still  do some things like, write, focusing on making my life enjoyable  and meaningful

and simply, LIVING

Maybe this is what's normal...not going about my days unaware, unappreciative, and sooo consumed with the "big things".